With all due respect, Dick...

Mr. Cheney - Please, do me a favor and just shut the fuck up already.  So, you emerge from your dungeon to tell the world how you are: offended by the reporting of another huge spy job against the American people.  How you say that you find it so

"disturbing that some in the media take it upon themselves to disclose vital national security programmes, thereby making it more difficult for us to prevent future attacks against the American people."

You know what, Dick - may I call you that?  That shit just don't fly anymore.  Actually, it stopped flying around 2002 or so when you were offended that we didn't want to invade Iraq NOW, before there would be "mushroom clouds", presumably from weapons that your buddy Reagan's administration sold them.

So, Mr. 18% approval, it really doesn't matter anymore what the hell you find "offensive", especially with your stellar track record when it comes to your high-horse lecturing of what offends your sorry ass vs. your oh-so-pure actions.

You claim to be offended by criticism of the torture of prisoners in Gitmo.  But torturing them to the point that they commit suicide is ok.  Holding boys who are under the age of 15 as prisoners for years without charges in Gitmo is ok.  Rendition of "suspects" to other countries to be tortured isn't offensive either, is it?  Bombing entire cities with white phosphorus? Let me guess, just peachy too.  Lobbying Congress not to pass anti-torture laws?  Ain't nothing offensive about that.  Or to lean on Congress to not investigate the pressure you put on the CIA to lie about Saddam and yellowcake uranium.  Or aluminum tubes.  Or, according to Powell's Chief of Staff, all of the other lies and strongarming to march our brave soldiers off to kill and die for your sick personal game of Risk.

While we are on the topic of lying....I guess lying isn't offensive, or something to be "offended by" either.  Even something as stupid as having never met John Edwards, despite there being pictures of the two of you together.  Or how Saddam and Al Qaeda were working together.  And how Iraq was involved in 9/11.  How about those "last throes", what was that - over a goddamn year ago?  "We will be greeted with flowers and as liberators."  A secret energy commission that was made up of a map of Iraqi oil fields.  Was it not offensive to have, along with Rumsfeld, convinced Bush to blow off and not deal with Iran when they reached out during late 2001, as well as 2002 and 2003 to stamp out Al Qaeda?

And I guess that war profiteering doesn't offend your black-hearted sensitive self either.  The cool $2 million tax refund you got from donating your stock option income from Halliburton.  You know Halliburton, the company that you had "no financial ties to" but still manage to make a tidy sum every year from them.  And no-bid contracts where you can use offshore companies to rip off We the Taxpayers and inflate the stock price even more for when you cash out of more stock that you "don't have".  How about the off shore companies that Halliburton used throughout the 1990s in order to get around the sanctions against doing business with Iran?  

No - none of that is offensive.  Nor is the fact that you had 5 deferments because you "had other priorities".  But John Kerry's wounds from actually serving make him the chump.  Nice try, douchebag.

What about your Congressional voting record?  Voting against releasing Nelson Mandela?  Against making Martin Luther King Day a national holiday?  Against Project Head Start?  Yeah, that is something to not be offended by.  Proud of, even.

And as for your latest tantrum about exposing national security secrets, need I remind you how fucking ironic it is for you to say a word on this?  How much you look the damn fool by chiming in about leaking classified information?  Oh of course, it is ok to have Bush pass an Executive Order that allows you to declassify information on his behalf.  And then use that as a reason to leak, I mean "declassify" sensitive information, let alone incorrect information to your criminally indicted Chief of Staff so he could pass that on for political gain.  

Before I forget your line of "making it more difficult to prevent future attacks" by terrorists, didn't you do just that by exposing Valerie Plame's identity, along with all of the other Brewster Jennings agents who were tracking nuclear weapons in the Middle East, including your latest sick fantasy country to attack?  Nope, that's not offensive either.  

Clearly you have no shame.  Clearly, you have no soul.  I guess that last 18% will stick around until they see you actually kicking puppies while eating a live baby on national television, but who knows.....

For the rest of us, Dick - do us all a favor and keep your damn yap shut.  It's as annoying as it is disgusting and irrelevant already.

Or even better, in your own words, "go fuck yourself".