Friday, December 21, 2007

Saluting the Veterans of the War on Christmas

For starters, I must give a hat tip to Brandon Friedman for coming up with that saying as we were going back and forth discussing sayings that we should be using this upcoming year.

But at this time of year, especially on Christmas time - a holiday where religion is now intertwined and nearly synonymous with a front running Presidential candidacy - we should celebrate some deserving yet underappreciated people. These battle tested, wounded and weary warriors whose crusade to engage, battle and fight with those “non-believers” and satan lovers (liberals too, no doubt) who are waging this War on Christmas.

How can we not take a moment to stop and thank those who stand tall and use every weapon at their disposal in order to fight a cataclysmic fight to the death against the godless souls who want to purge the world from celebrating the birth of the one who represents all “true Americans”.

People like Fred Thompson:

COLMES: Senator, you recently got the endorsement of Congressman Steve Young. And you were very happy about that. Steve King, excuse me. You were happy to get that endorsement. He recently initiated HR847, recognizing Christianity as a great faith, expressing support for Christmas. Is this a good use of Congress's time? Do you support that kind of legislation? Is this a good thing for this guy to be doing?

THOMPSON: I don't know anything about that bill. I know Congressman King though, and I would tend to think that anything he would do would be totally appropriate.

COLMES: ...Are candidates trying to out-God each other? We keep hearing, you know — Mike Huckabee has been talked about a little while. Some people think there's a cross in his new add, Christian leader in one of the ads. Where do you stand on this issue of candidates trying to out- God each other in this race?

THOMPSON: Well, the candidates are going to have to make up their own minds about what they think is appropriate. There's no question that faith is important to us as a people, and it's important to our country. You know, the Declaration of Independence itself points out that our basic rights come from God and not from government, and that's been our tradition, and always will be.

“Our basic rights come from God and not from government, and that’s been our tradition, and always will be.” In response to a question about whether candidates are trying to “out-God” each other. Bravo, Grandpa Fred. A score of 97 on the unintentional comedy scale. Truly a brave soldier in the War on Christmas.

And to you, John Gibson, a brave Veteran with the excellent use of the battle tested “deny, deny, accuse” attack by (1) promoting himself and Mike Huckabee for predicting that this War would lead to someone like Huckabee making his ad as if he was provoked by the "political correctness pushing Christians out of the public square" and (2) condemning Huckabee for “upping the ante” over Bush in over-the-top messianic Christian crusader that was condemned for the public expression of his faith.

Yes!!! A Medal of Freedom for Mr. Gibson for denying that this is Huckabee’s fault, and that it was something he warned about - AND blaming it on the other side.

And as a highly decorated four star general in this War on Christmas who has been through three prior War’s as well, Bill O’Reilly, (this is a pretty funny article) who just this week went on the offensive with a brutal attack against Great Barrington that has been compared favorably to the “shot heard round the world”.

On this stealth surprise attack in the middle of the night, O’Reilly sent one of his top commanders and launched a devastating attack against the town council:

Watters told the council "You guys are attacking these Christmas lights here" and asked "is this some kind of ruse to de-emphasize Christmas?" Omigod. When a council member replied that "that is not an accurate statement" Watters asked him "what are your feelings regarding the Christmas lights?" He was told they were private feelings and none of his business, then was dressed down further by another member who told him they resented his accusations of attacking Christmas, or Christianity, and said they were asking very reasonable questions in trying to save the environment.
Major Watters is certainly due for a promotion after this bold and daring initiative where he literally put himself at risk and in the direct line of fire.

So with these inspiring stories of the Christmas War Vets, I now realize how proud I should be to have these brave Soldiers of God here to protect me in this long and ongoing War on Christmas - putting themselves at risk and laughing in the face of danger against the Godless souls who are slowly trying to suffocate Christmas out of this great country.

Next thing you know, they’ll be fighting against those who want to make it so the sales, songs, celebrating and decorations can’t start until after Halloween.

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