The past ten years have been a bit rough for me in some respects, although they have turned out rather well in others. From a personal perspective, I had a marriage fall apart due largely in part to an eating disorder that ultimately took the life of my ex-wife. This was right around 9/11 (when I was working in the city), which was also around the time that my employer, Andersen, went under. Granted, there are many people who have had it much worse than I have, and I don’t seek to compare my “misery” to anyone else’s.
However, one thing I learned was that after getting kicked in the gut, I could either stay down or dust myself off and get back up on my feet. Luckily, I was able to do that in many instances and I have learned a lot about myself in the process. You know, that whole “that which does not kill me makes me stronger” thing...
And this is something that I have come back to repeatedly over the past few years. This administration has done so many things that have baffled the mind. Lies that were so large and egregious and so damaging. Leaking of classified information, torture of people who were “determined” to be “enemies” based on a whim. Illegal invasions and willful ignoring of evidence. Suppressing free speech, dismantling the Constitution, assertions that members of the Executive Branch are above the law. Illegal spying on American citizens within the United States. Obstruction of justice. All done with a smirk that smacked of “fuck you, America, fuck you, world community”.
The list goes on and on and on.
Yesterday’s news was not unexpected, yet it still felt like a swift kick in the gut. Comments of outrage by Democratic leaders were also not unexpected, yet this being the “last straw” for them to finally pursue long overdue impeachment charges is still, to me, a long shot. And just as I want to throw up my hands and say “motherfuckers...this is too much already...” I know that is not my nature.
So with that (also ironically being on the eve on Independence Day), just as part of me says that this has become too much of an uphill battle, too much to deal with, too much to take on, too great odds to win, I once again must pick myself up, dust myself off and resolve to continue to fight.
There is too much at stake.
I must stay focused on making this world a better place for my children and grandchildren. To do all I can, no matter how small, to bring our troops home. To help protect the environment. To continue to expose and spread the word of the crimes committed by this administration, the corruption within our government and those who actively or passively support them. To pressure Democratic and republican leaders to do what We the People elected them to do. To hold those accountable for their actions - especially those who have abused their position and/or power.
To get Scott Garrett (NJ-5), the nuttiest of wingnut Congressmen out of office. To take better care of myself – mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually. To try and change a few minds about the ills that are going on in the world but are not being reported. To try and help those who are less fortunate than I am. To help move the conversation and level of discourse in a productive direction.
To keep fighting for what is right and what I believe in.
And thus, today, I pick myself up, once again, to do my small part. It ain’t easy, but the alternative is unacceptable.